2.01.2013

the sweetness of my parents : the right way to love -- rachel from feel good time



to kick off fourteen days of love, we have rachel from feel good time. i stumbled across her blog when i saw a photo of her stunning, classic wedding dress on pinterest and i have to admit, i am absolutely in love with her style in its entirety. and she is beautiful on the inside and out, don't you think? thank you so much for taking the time to post today, rachel. take the time to check out her blog [here] and maybe grab a tissue or two before reading this adorable post :) 
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THE SWEETNESS OF MY PARENTS
the right way to love
 
     If there is one thing to learn in life, it is to love and love the right way. My parents, through their example, have taught me this important lesson. To me, their relationship is nothing but sweet and selfless. I wouldn’t say flawless because no love comes without flaws. What makes love beautiful is looking past the flaws and focusing on the sweetness.
       The more I began to understand love; I looked to my parents and would watch carefully and listen attentively. I began to pick up on things that they would do or say, the way that they would look at each other, and the small things that drew the smiles and created the laughter. It turned out that their recipe is quite simple, in deed. They only said positive things to each other and never pointed out the negatives of one another. As I look back, I cannot recall a time where they used hateful words towards each other, where they put another one down, not even through sarcasm. Instead, all I remember hearing, and still hearing are compliments, pick-me-ups and sweet nothings.
         I remember running errands with my parents not too long ago and my mom ran into a shop while my dad and I stayed in the car, and as she was walking in, we were both watching her from behind and my dad simply said, “Isn’t your mom just amazing?” Indeed she is amazing, but I took note of how much my dad admired my mom, and how he would verbally say it. Not just to himself, and not just to her, but to others as well. He showed me a great example by showing others, especially his children, how he thought of my mom. I couldn’t help but think in that moment, how I had hoped to find a man who could sit back and say to a friend how awesome I was, even when I wasn’t around.
        
         There have been multiple moments where my mom would do the same, just out of the blue, even when my dad wasn’t around and when it was completely off topic. “Isn’t your dad such a firecracker?” “Isn’t he just so funny!” “Wow, does he look great today or what?”

       And that is just that, compliment, compliment, compliment. Build each other up. Emphasize one another’s accomplishments, perfections, and positive attributes and simply try hard to ignore the flaws and never bring it to one’s attention. Even if it kills you.

         Being married now, it’s easy to put one another down when the little things drive each other crazy, but it is not worth it to draw attention upon it. Never speak ugly to your spouse. Always think of why you love your significant other and praise them. Just adore one another with the sweetness of love.

         I’ve also learned from my parents that, the older they get, the younger they become. Now, let me get one thing straight, my mom is wild, in a very classy way, mind you. I just mean that she is always fixin’ to have some fun. She is youthful, always looking for adventure, always laughing and always dancing. And for all of these attributes I am so thankful. She makes life exciting and I see how it affects my dad. He thrives off of it, he yearns for her energy and together they make quite a zoot suit riot! I’d say my dad is a little more reserved on the dance floor but he doesn’t mind sitting back and letting my mom bust some moves and while she does her thing I notice he is always sitting back with a smirk and nodding his head thinking how good he’s got it. Isn’t that how love should be? Youthful, carefree and young?

         I do believe, secretly, that my dad is a romantic at heart. How can he not be when his all-time favorite movie is “Meet Joe Black?” Growing up we’d listen to the soundtrack every Sunday throughout the whole day. No matter which room you were in, it was blasting through the intercom system. It wasn’t hard choosing the song I’d dance to with my dad at my wedding. Piece of cake. It was “What a Wonderful World” by my favorite, Louis Armstrong.

         When things were getting serious with the Zoo and I (now my husband, real name Zeke; I just like to call him the zoo) my dad sent me an email saying how he loves movies, especially ones where he actually learns something new or can take something from it into his life. So, he sent me his favorite quote from “Meet Joe Black.” It’s the moment when the father is talking to his daughter about finding the right guy. He says to her:

“Love is passion, obsession, someone you can’t live without. I say, fall head over heels. Find someone you can love like crazy and who will love you the same way back. How do you find him? Well, you forget your head, and you listen to your heart. And I’m not hearing any heart. Cause the truth is, honey, there’s no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love, well, you haven’t lived a life at all. But you have to try, cause if you haven’t tried, you haven’t lived.”

       My dad continued to explain to me, “I think this is so true… and that’s exactly how I feel about your mom. I can’t imagine loving your mom more than I do, and I honestly have more passion, obsession for her than I did when we were first married. What is even better is if the person you love feels the same way about you.”
       This hit home for me. And it’s so true. Forget your head, and listen to your heart. Vanity. I’ve also learned how ugly that word is and how to try and do your best to forget your head and the vain ways of the world and fall in love with humility. Forget your dream man, he’s not real and quite honestly, he’s not for you. There is someone better out there for you who will get you, understand you, feel for you, and listen to you and through all of these actions of love, they will be beautiful in the way that every human being should be.

         I love the love of my parents. It’s not perfect but the way that they treat each other and show me how to love allows them to love the best that they can and in a way that is very much real. I’m thankful for their example and I am thankful for the love of my husband. No, our love is not perfect either, but if we do the things that I learned from my parents, we can and will have a wonderful life. 

1 comment:

  1. LOVE this! oh, i am so excited for 14 days of love!!

    ReplyDelete

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