9.06.2009

Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly. -Anonymous


You know those days when you get the mean reds? The mean reds, you mean like the blues? No. The blues are because you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long. You're just sad, that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of.
It's been a week filled with mean reds. It's been one of those weeks filled with fear and doubt and questioning and wondering. It's been one of those weeks where I could just curl up in my oversized Jackson Hole sweatshirt, spend some time with Ben and Jerry, and watch Breakfast at Tiffany's. I would've if I owned that movie and had the time. Not to discount all of the good this week. Though it has been an especially tough one, I have found myself learning something new everyday and finding small tender mercies everywhere. However, spending the weekend with my family has been just what the doctor ordered. My family is my ultimate support system. They are my best friends and they are always there for me when I feel friendless. Home is where I can find open arms and listening ears. Home is where I can be silent and still be heard. Home is where sorrow is divided and joy is multiplied. I know that it doesn't matter how many games we win, how many awards we receive, how many material possessions we own or how many friends we have, none of that will compare to the eternal nature of our families and our personal relationships with our family members. I am forever grateful for my family's endless love and support. I couldn't make it without them. Right now it seems like I am taking two steps forward and three back. It's been hard, but I know that it's a huge opportunity for growth. It's time to refine my inner butterfly and emerge from the cocoon even better!

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